Christmas and Birthdays Are Not For Everyone

Let's be clear first.  I am not referring to the quasi-religious aspects of Christmas.  I am referring to the custom of compulsory gift-giving on both the above-named occasions (Christmas and birthdays).  This custom has clearly far exceeded in importance any religious observances  long ago.  The real celebrators are the merchants.  We already knew that.

But apart from the apparent need to create Christmas bonuses for store employees, what importance does gift-giving really have for adults?  (We leave kids out of this discussion because they are supposed to be greedy and self-centered.)  Perhaps when we are young and starting out gifts can be helpful.  It's hard to understand why we need an excuse to give such gifts.  People we know and love will appreciate the gifts but waiting and giving one day a year seems a little constricted.

There comes a time when gifts become more of an obligation than a pleasure.  We eventually have everything we really need, or else the wherewithal to get them, and waiting until December 25 is absurd when we need to buy a new toaster now.  Giving gifts is equally tedious, not because we don't love the recipients (or at least should), but because choosing the gifts becomes an exercise in shopping for things  we are told  to get.  We become an extension of the gift catalogues and shopping advertisements.  We don't buy out of love so much as because they have ordered through us what they want or need.  This is about as personal as online shopping.

Birthdays are much the same.  Past a certain age the actual count of years is pretty meaningless.  Here we are, vertical and above-ground. We shouldn't need to be informed of our age. It's not for the birthday boy or girl.  It's to tell us we matter to them.  But why wait to tell us we are important?  The odds continually increase against us completing the year.  We would like to be told on occasion that we're important to those we love, and preferably on a more regular basis, and not with presents or a ceremony but with a hug and an extra smile, and a laugh at the old jokes that you have heard before.

Now for the old people in particular (and you know damn well who you are). What can you get us old ones that we don't have?  If we wanted it we would already have it.  We get to the age where getting rid of objects that require attention and maintenance is preferable.  We have accumulated "stuff" for years, and now it is increasingly burdensome and needs to go away, not accumulate more.  Maybe a night out together for dinner, or an invite over to see the grandkids, and a lot more often than one damn time a year.  Even items are ok as long as they are perishable.

Don't try to buy us off with a "funny" card pointing out how old we have become, or with a present that we have no use for.  Why make a point of how many years we have been on this earth?  We already know how long that has been.  Reminding us is more a downer than an upper.  Who thought we would make it this long?  But the time for appreciation of the love and support we can give you is now.  Tomorrow comes faster every day.